shake it
like a polaroid picture
2.28.2002
**Recording Industry Totally Not Kidding Dammit**
"Recording Academy President C. Michael Greene used his speech at the bland and totally rigged Grammy Awards to lobby for an end to rampant electronic music-swapping, which he said is damaging the recording industry and totally screwing with his ability to scam millions of dollars from the idiot public in a thinly veiled act of major ongoing consumer fraud. "This illegal file-sharing and ripping of music is pervasive, out of control and it's oh so criminal," Greene said, as no one anywhere actually had any idea what this guy actually does for a living,as in actual work. The industry complains that record sales are plummeting and profit margins are thin, largely because of the illegal swapping of music files over the Internet, and not because the recording industry has been ripping off consumers for years and gleefully overcharging and gouging artists for major chunks of their livelihoods and artificially inflating the cost of CDs and being entirely slothful in keeping up with new technologies because they're largely lazy and corporate and unethical. "You little punk-ass kids keep this up, and I won't be able to make my Hummer payments," Greene should've added, wagging a finger, secretly longing for the time when a very drunk David Hasselhoff serenaded him in his hot tub and he felt his first real pangs of genuine love." -- Mark Morford, always worth the price of admission.
We spent most of the day at the beach today. I took some pictures. My chain broke on the way home. Still a great day.
Whether Jack is the belle of the ball in a chatroom or emailing politicians and companies about some topical issue or product, he's not shy about prattling on incessantly about whatever interests him.
Don't you just want to kick Jack's teeth down his everloving throat?
Having said that, this article on "e-fluentials" was a good read, and cut through the bullshit quite nicely. Shift is the best technology magazine published today. If you aren't reading it, you should be.
Jeff's guitar playing post is positively inspirational.
Jason Lytle, Call and Response, Daniel Johnston
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If only we knew then what we knew now... She should have thrown a whole bakery.
Last night I posted more on Michael Greene's speech, including a link, to metafilter, where it's generated a lot of commentary. I wanted to point out, however, that if they gave these three kids two days to download all the music they could, and the kids just came up with 6K songs.... They're chumps. That's an afternoon in the park.
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2.27.2002
I just saw the Grammys. What the fuck was that lecture from the record industry guy with the obligatory goatee?
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"Though numerous groups have attempted the feat, an adult giant squid, Architeuthis dux , which can grow as long as a city bus, has never been seen alive, though countless dead ones have come up in fishing nets. Steve O'Shea of New Zealand's National Institute of Water and Atmospheric Research, in Wellington, decided to take a novel approach and hunt for baby, or juvenile giant squid, which are roughly the size of an ant." A great read, via mefi.
I'm really enjoying reading about Kool Bobby's juice fast.
" I would rather be chained to a cheetah and dragged through a street of knives than listen to another Alanis Morissette song. What I feel for her isn't simple hate, it is an all-encompassing repulsion not unlike what you might feel if you woke up to discover a four-pound cockroach using your toothbrush." The link is to a spectaular Washington Post article (via today's papers). But the quote originally comes from Spite.
But the whole thing makes me stop and thing for a minute. The record company "alternatives" are no more. Everyone knows the game. Sure there's numetal, pop punk, and a thousand and one radiohead knockoffs, all of which record companies are aiming directly at sullen alientated teens. But for some reason it doesn't seem as egregious as it did in the mid 90s. The lies aren't quite as baldfaced. Bad as she may be, Britney is no Alanis. Alanis, in fact, used to be Britney and then tried to become PJ Harvey. And that was the problem.
2.26.2002
Hysterical
Why Your Flight Was Delayed Last Week
Last Thursday, I got off of a plane in Oakland.I had flown there from San Diego, where I'd driven after a week in Baja. I was sunburned, tired, and my brain was cycling low. When the plane landed, I donned my silly straw hat, shouldered my daypack, and untrundled my guitar from The Overhead Bin (which must remain closed during take off and landing. which the guitar was stored in as per faa regulations). Since we were sitting in the extra comfortable emergency exit row, we took our time getting off. But as the plane cleared, we walked out onto the concourse. When the light hit me, I reached in my pocket for my sunglasses. The really nice pair of Smith's with the adjustable lenses I bought last Fall. The ones I couldn't afford to replace.
They weren't there. Nor were they in my bag. Nor anywhere that I could find. "My sunglasses," I said to Harper.
Then I turned and trotted to the gate.
People were still getting off of the plane. All was not lost. I started onto the jetway. A woman who worked for Southwest immediately blocked me and gave me the "sir sir."
I realized what I had almost done. Airports shut down these days because of idiots like me bolting onto a jet. She asked what the deal was. I explained to her. She patiently told me that I couldn't go back on the plane. Then she went to go look for the sunglasses herself.
All of the suddenI realized I was wearing the aforementioned silly straw hat. I took off the hat.
"Oh shit." There were the glasses. Under the hat. On my head. I was even more flustered. "Oh shit."
I promptly started to head for the jetway again, without thinking. This time a security guard just put his hand in front of me.
"Can't go that way sir."
"Oh. Yeah. Um. Sorry. That's right. Hey. Um. Can you tell her I found the glasses?"
I slunk off.
(I should point out that I never actually got to the jetway either time, SW stopped me at the counter in both instances of my extraordinary stupidity)
Harp rides again.
I added several new items to my cafe press store.
Forgive me father for I have sinned (thanks Dave!)
Beautiful, you magnificent genius.
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Hey guys, people don't want to kill monsters with machine guns, no matter how many kinds of guns you give them.
That's right, Jim. People want to kill people. (by the way the turtle's made of wood, hand-painted too)
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Ken Layne blogs for Fox News now? What gives?
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First Bush confuses the word "devaluation" with "deflation" and sends the yen tumbling, now Fox gets confused about where our troops are and sends the Dow tumbling. What is it about America's dumbest president and America's dumbest news service that make them want to crash world markets?
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I updated my reading list page again because a) I just finished "In the Lake of the Woods" last night and more importantly b) I set the page up as a Blogger site, converted it to php, and added the ability for readers to comment.
So you can talk about the books. Like a real life book club. Like we're on Oprah or something. Oprah!
Wanna buy some junk from Enron? (thanks eric!)
2.25.2002
I wish that before Contentville went busto, I'd ordered a copy of my Mom's dissertation.
I'm working on the tectonically long load time...
any better?
There's an interesting article in the Sunday Times on Stephen Merritt. 69 Love Songs is one of my favorite albums of the last five to seven years. I've listened to it over and over and over again. The enormity of it, with all of its various plots and subplots, overwhelmed me, and earned The Magnetic Fields a (rightful I believe) place in the indie rock hall of fame. Or hell of fame, as it is so excurciatingly limited.
I've been reading electrolicious lately (since finding it via evhead). I'ts well-written and fun to read. Her post on marriage got me to thinking about all of the other things you do or don't do simply because that's what society dictates. This is particularly viscous in musical circles. "Oh, I define myself as X so I can't go see Y because as an X afficianado I must heap scorn and derision on all of Y's music. Even though I secretly enjoy Y. Something I will only admit after several drinks, and even then I must couch it in ironic terms. Even if I find it imminently listenable and sometimes when I'm home all alone I dance around the room to a copy of the song I downloaded off the Internet and sing along with it into an egg beater that I pretend is a microphone. And deep in my secret heart I love it. Really love it. But I can never admit that." Screw that. Do what you want. As long as it doesn't hurt anyone, including yourself, there's no reason not to live your life free of societal constraints. The personal is only as political as you choose to make it.
I've been doing a pretty good job of keeping my 2002 reading list updated. Let's hope I can keep it up.
I love San Francisco
Case in point. I woke up yesterday and shuffled down to Nimer's, the corner store for a Cliff Bar. My man RC was working and the two of us chatted for a few minutes about various things. He told me that I had missed a hell of a house party the night before on the corner across from the store, and I told him that I'd seen people all over the street last night milling around outside the place, with a steady thumping beat coming from above. RC said the entire joint was wall to wall people, and that the cops had finally broken it up at around 6 am. At this point I looked over across the street to the house and saw on the corner...
A giant foam pig head.
(click to enlarge)
Which I immediately claimed as my own via the law of Curb Karma. This is the essence of the city to me, wake to discover that you have a giant foam pig head. I would go weeks, even months, on end in Georgia without finding a giant foam pig head. I couldn't even buy one in a store. And here. Here I just wake up one morning, and there it is on my doorstep. So to speak.
And it was a gorgeous California day, no clouds to be seen and as warm as Baja. After a quick sandwich, we headed over to hippie hill. Harp did some Yoga while I laid in the grass with my shirt off, reading. Hundreds of people were out. People were dancing, drumming, fluting, twirling, stilt-walking, reading books up in trees, playing hackey-sack volleyball, smoking pipes and hookahs, playing clarinets, french horns, saxophones, trumpets, electric guitars, turntables, drum machines, bells, xylophones, and instruments of their own creation. I saw turtles, snakes, parrots (on a bike, no less), dogs, cats, punk rockers, indie rockers, mods, ravers, hippies, preppies, tribal types with dreds and bad teeth, militant queers, aged old beats, small children, all nationalities, hula hoops, homeless drunks, balloons, bicycles, artists, kites, public nudity, twitch-dancers girls who should have turned back but because what's at daddy's house was so impossibly horrific--too awful to even imagine or contemplate--forged ahead instead and fucked like Caligula in the California sun while black ink slowly covers their flesh inch by square inch until the darkness outside makes that within seem bearable, Rastafarians, capoeira, computers, cameras, and even a cop or two, standing idly by, smiling.
This is why so many wonderfully strange eclectic people choose to make the city by the bay their home.
Just as we arrived at hippie hill (and what an unfortunate moniker, particularly considering the eclectic crowd drawn there), I broke the chain on my bike, beyond repair, I thought. but we stopped at Cyco SF on the way home and Pete, from whom Harp bought a bike, fixed it for free. They're always fixing things for free there.We ended the day with a trip to Rainbow grocery, and our fridge is now chock full of soy, while the cabinets are bursting with curry.
I love San Francisco
Ed Rosenthal, the infamous expert on Marijuana cultivation got busted. Sort of.
Want to ask hardcore icons Ian MacKaye (Fugazi, Minor Threat) or Mike Watt (minutemen, fIREHOSE) a question? Here's your chance.
2.23.2002
Two weeks ago we were over at out friends Gene and DeSha's house, and Gene put in Stop Making Sense. It turned out to be one of those movies that I always thought I had seen, but never had. I wanted to watch it again, so I rented it and have had it on while I'm cleaning up the aprtment, waiting on Harp to get home for work, unpacking, organizing photos, and getting ready to go to Jish's party over at Ev's house. (All while drinking a Tecate and learning how to play "psycho killer" on the guitar, I might add.)
Anyway.
Something that struck me about the movie is how contemporary it looks, and I think that's due to the stark blacks whites and greys. Nothing in the movie is overly 8os, either (aside from the cargo suits, but they're unobtrusive). It got me thinking how most things I like are classic forms and classic colors. Althoug I appreciate flashy design, I find that it rarely holds up over time. This principle carries over to a lot of things for me, music and literature included. I guess it means that I'll never be bleeding edge, but I'm not so sure that's a bad thing.
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Sheesh.
Going through the budget. I way overspent in Mexico. If you're an editor with a cushy high-dollar assignment sitting on your desk (or even a fun low-dollar assignment) feel free to think of me
McSweeney's Issue 7 arrived in the mail today (thanks Bart!). the issue's 9 stories each has its own softcover book, all of which are encased in one hardback cover, wrapped with the thickest rubber band I've ever seen. The whole package is roughly the size of two bricks laid side by side.
I wrote a song for Jish
I called it The Jish Song
warning, filew is about 11-12MB
Thanks to Jeff Saunders for the audio and video production, as well as the recording space and guitar.
2.22.2002
Jeff Mangum songs break my heart.
The Day In Pictures comes to Bowling Green (Harp's home town).
Baja pictures are up.
Harper's back!
Genuine X-Ray Goggles? Yeah, right. Via Instant Enemy.
I'm so glad to read mefi again (where I poached that earthquake link below from, btw). I am admittedly biased towards all things Georgia, that pipsqueak little nazi wannabe Bob Barr excluded, but I'm a huge fan of Jimmy Carter's. Harp and I even spent some time talking about him on our vacation, in fact. So it was interesting to readthis discussion on MeFi about his statements on Bush's "axis of evil."
Dang. I miss all the good earthquakes. And just think, I was in Calexico and Mexicali on Wednesday and San Diego yesterday.
Holy shit. I've got to get to Rene di Rosa's place. It seems like it's a bit like Paradise Gardens, though not at all like Finster.
The Kome Home KBK song by Jeff and Ezra fucking rocks. The end is brilliant.
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As I've said, I'm going to upload pictures of our trip. But since I'm going to try to sell a few of them, and for space considerations, I won't be uploading high-rez versions of everything. But I am uploading a few shots that I think make good desktop pictures/wallpaper for your computer.
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I've got an overwhelming amount of email to sort through today... Apologies if you've written me and I'm slow getting back.
And since I went on about what I loved in Mexico, here are a few complaints:
- Guidebooks suck. We had two, "Lonely Planet Baja" and Hidden Baja. Both were awful, both were highly inaccurate, neither was particularly useful. For example, the hotel, the Motel El Pescador, we stayed in was one of the best places in town, as well as the cheapest. It wasn't reccomended by either guidebook, yet both provided faulty descriptions. Oddly enough, the hotels recommended were dumps, and they cost a lt more money to boot. The same was true of the restaurants. We met a really cool couple from Northern California who also had the LP Baja, and the same complaint. The four of us discussed it over a lousy, overpriced dinner at a place the Hidden Baja book called the bext restaurant in town. As Matthew said (and I'm paraphrasing), "I thought LP was suppossed to find out of the way places that were indicative of the country. Instead it reccomends places like the Tiajuana Denny's." I'm writing my own guide to San Felipe.
- I'd never been to TJ before. I'm not sure what I was expecting. Daytona Beach with taco stands, tequilla bars, maquiladoras, and easily obtainable prescription drugs, I guess. Which it was, and I'm sure there's a lot to be said for TJ. But I was so overwhelmed by the air pollution that it became pretty much all I could focus on. I was in Kuwait rebuilding for three months immediately after the Gulf War. To give you some idea of how bad the air was, I left before they started filming Fires of Kuwait. And although the sky overhead wasn't black in TJ, the low-level pollution certainly reminded me of Kuwait. When we woke up in the morning, I went out to get some shaving cream and razors from a nearby pharmacy while Harper showered and got ready. As soon as I opened the door the chemical smell of the air hit me, and I had the onset of a headache (that would grow to epic preportions before we got out of town) by the time I got back to the room. I assume much of the pollution is due to the maquiladoras, and what isn't is due to auto eissions. Anyone who isn't thouroghly convinced that we have to do whatever it takes to reduce emissions, from all sources, on a global scale needs to spend a week in TJ. It's actually quite frightening.
- San Felipe is host to lots of off-road racing enthousiasts. See points above and below.
- Gringos. I love the USA. I would not want to spend the rest of my life anywhere else. But Americans themselves can be some of the most obnoxious, arrogant, obtuse people on the planet. Sometimes, when traveling in a foreign country, I just want to apologize for their behavior. I'm shocked sometimes at how rude they can be to their hosts (you're a guest, remember, dipshit?). It's as basic as bothering to try and speak the language. I see European and Asian touristas in San Francisco all the time. When they ask me questions, and it does happen on occasion, they ask in English. If you're in Mexico--or Thailand, or France, or India, or wherever--at least learn the basic phrases you need to get by. The other thing is that Gringos tend to loudly voice opinions on the superiority of American culture. If traveling makes you feel that way, hey, good for you. I'm sure that makes you appreciate your home all the more, and that's a great thing. Be happy with what you've got. Digging the scene with a gangster lean and all that. But why tell your hosts that? Would you want a guest of yours telling you how much better it is back at their place in Gstaad? I found all the driving through San Felipe's malecon and revving the engines of whatever off-road thingie you drive to be similarly obnoxious. True, there were quite a few Mexicans who did the same thing. But overwhelmingly when I heard an engine racing obnoxiously, or glass pipes on a bike, I'd look up and see a fifty-something anglo with his socks pulled up to his thighs and an American flag T-Shirt.
But that's it. And I don't want to complain too much. It was a spectacular vacation, we're already trying to figure out when we can go back. It was the most amazing week I've had in a long, long time.
San Felipe
I miss it already. I'll post a host of pictures later today (say that three times fast, I dare you), but take my word it was truly beautiful. Some highlights:
- $1 for two fish tacos, rice and beans at Mariscos Conchita.
- My Espanol was much better than I expected. Fluent, no. But I could get by when talking to folks who didn't speak English, although I'm sure I mangled the language.
- Utterly secluded beaches.
- Tecate, the Tecate that comes in a bottle. Lots of Tecate.
- Sol, and not the kind that comes in a bottle. Lots of Sol.
- Amazing Sunsets.
- Finding a shark tooth on the beach.
- San Felipe's Malecon.
- Learning to play Guantanamera on the guitar from a Mariachi (it's easy, and yes we brought our own guitar).
- Harper. Lots of Harper.
Thanks to all my guest bloggers: Ezra, Bob, Mac, Helen Jane, Loren and Dave. You guys (and gal) kick ass. It was particularly cool to come back and find my page singing to me. But as much as I loved the Fugazi midi, I took it down today in favor of cube-friendly silence.
But I've got to say that the Blog for me project turned out much better than I expected. Particularly because it seemed to me that people's personalities came through. I was a little worried that folks would feel pressure to blog the same kind of stuff, or style.
So I was delighted to see Dave's pop-culture detrius and politics, Loren's Alabama links and college focus, Helen Jane's delightful prose (which reminds me of birdsong for some reason) and snack food references, Mac's take on Irish stereotypes, Bob's astute political commentary, and Ezra's poetry-cum-hangover.
I truely owe each and every one of you. Really. Thanks from the bottom of my heart.
Hi, my name's Mat and I'll be your blogger for today.
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2.21.2002
Here's another way Enron hurts everyday Americans. A third of the residents of Connecticut will have to shell out nearly $50 more each year to continue having their garbage picked up. Why? Apparently Connecticut's State Trash Authority handed over $220 million to Enron. And they aren't getting it back. The state's attorney general is now labelling it as nothing more than an unsecured loan "disguised and camouflaged" as some kind of energy transaction. Where did that money go, exactly?
If you watched Frontline's Hidden History of the SUV, you're probably pretty spooked by the thousands and thousands of people killed by SUV rollovers. Late today another voice was heard from: the National Research Council, publicly criticizing the government's SUV safety ratings system.
Er, I was supposed to introduce myself I guess. I run the web-log at AOL Watch .org, though I'm also using the domain for side projects like the "Is Bush Still President" clock and a Star Trek quote server.
This weekend I was seized with the idea for a new project, and spent hours coding and polishing a new web toy. Tuesday it was unveiled, a web quiz asking viewers to guess whether a lyric was sung by Aimee Mann or Annette Funicello.
I've proudly forwarded that URL to my friends, but for you, gentle Honan.net reader, there's an added surprise. I created a secret second page that keeps track of which questions stumped the most quiz-takers! (Of the 42 people who have taken the quiz so far, a whopping 80% got the last question wrong!)
"The Republicans are willing to hold hearings and say how terrible [Enron] is for employees and investors. But they are so careful to run away from any suggestion that this is an indictment of our political system."
A fun article in the L.A. Times about the California Congressman who, when it comes to Enron, has become "the biggest pain in the ass in Congress" according to one Republican Committee Chairman.
If you're trying to keep up with all the Enron news, today there were more articles about Enron offering favors to banks and federal officials. But here's the best analysis I've seen, from the New York Times, that neatly explains why Enron has become so important to Americans. "Ultimately...the public fascination with Enron expresses an anxiety over whether the trust people place in their employers, political leaders, and even capitalism as it is currently practiced, is misplaced."
John Dean is even comparing Dick Cheney's refusal to hand over his energy meeting notes to the Watergate cover-up.
Mat! Mat! Mat!
He snuck onto the letters page at Suck.com -- but I knew it was him.
Okay, now that I've got the keys to the blog, what would Mat do?
He'd probably post something thought-provoking about Iran.
And if you don't feel crappy enough about Afghanistan already, the Red Cross reports that 10,000 remote Afghans are so impoverished and desperate that "girls as young as ten are being offered for marriage in exchange for bags of flour." When I first read that story, I hoped it was a mistake, like those inflammatory rumors reported as fact by Pakistani newspapers.
But it's not.
Hey look! It's Mat!
Confused? After GettingIt.com folded, Mat made a cameo in a paragraph I wrote for Suck.com. If you follow its link to Mother Jones' prank site, you'll see a photo of a man they identify as Mojo's Executive Producer, Jack Blinsky.
But it's really just our pal Mat!
I'd like to commemorate this occassion with the lyrics from the Hawaii 5-0 theme.
If you get in trouble, bring it home to me.
Whether I am near you, or across the sea.
I will think of something to do.
I'll be on the lookout for you
and I'll find you. You can count on me.
And don't you let 'em get you up against the wall.
'Cause I'll be there to catch you, and I won't let you fall.
Call me if they hit you below.
Call me when there's no where to go
and I'll be there. You can count on me.
And if they all desert you, and you start to bend
You know I won't let them hurt you. And I don't pretend.
Don't call if you've got nothing to say.
Don't call me if you just want to play.
But call me on Devil's Day.
You can count on
you can count on
you can count on
Count! On! Me!
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Yi-hawww!! I'm David Cassel, Mat's pal in Oakland. Mat and I worked at a web magazine called GettingIt.com for six months in 1999 -- and became great friends! I'll be your guest-blogger for today...
Played earlier today:
Hawaii 5-0
Dancing Queen (Abba)
It's Not Unusual (Tom Jones)
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2.20.2002
GoopyMart has some "Tres Cool" Desktop backgrounds as well!
Not to brag on Alabama, because yes I have lived here all my life and we are behind with schools, jobs, and many other areas, but Alabama is good (except Montgomery). Now good news comes to Alabama from Park City, Utah.
Alabama Gold
How about that Chevy!
I just can't be warm and nice at the same time!
I was watching TV this morning before work and there was a Pepsi commercial with Brittany Spears. This is nothing special alone, but it brings to memory a news story i came across a several days ago.
Brittany you sux!
Hi, guys and gals,
I'm Loren the guest blogger for today... by no means do I expect to live up to Mat, but i will try to do my best!
About me, I am a senior at Auburn University Montgomery (yes in Alabama) studying information systems. I've had several classes here taught by Mat's mother. My place on the net is broken right now (in hopes to get my page transfered to my own server and host it myself) and I plan to have it backup soon. So as soon as I do, I will pass the link on to mat.
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2.19.2002
yesterday, hilary and i were estatic to view such feature flicks
as kingpin, caddyshack and better off dead.
this cartoon from modern humorist made me fondly recall yesterday's movies.
today from the register....
A US developer is coming to market with a device which lets users recharge batteries using a foot-operated pump.
The StepCharger, from AladdinPower, gives approximately 20 minutes of laptop power after five minutes of brisk pumping.
This is not a great deal of time but, as AladdinPower customer services rep Max Smith told us, it could come in extremely handy if you're stuck without access to an external power source or a spare battery.
***
imagine how great it would be if we could power televisions and desktops and radios and hairdryers with our footsies.
oh, wait, as an american, it is my duty to practice my right to laziness.
please pass the terra chips.
today from the new scientist.
The world's Big Nine electronics companies have swallowed corporate pride and agreed on a single standard and name - Blu-Ray - for the next generation video and computer optical disc. Although good for the consumer, they are putting the future of their fledgling recordable DVD systems in jeopardy.
Blu-Ray is backed by Hitachi, LG, Matsushita (Panasonic), Pioneer, Philips, Samsung, Sharp, Sony and Thomson. Only Toshiba, the main inventor of DVD, and JVC, which has a vested interest in VHS, are missing.
interesting essay from across the pond...
do i want my musicians to fake it?
At our chamber concerts, listeners often say that it is fascinating to see how we communicate with one another and, in particular, how we "look involved" and "as if we're enjoying ourselves". This seems to give them the permission to enjoy themselves too.
i know that i shouldn't make these breezy proclamations
when not everyone can enjoy the wonderousness that is TiVo.
but please, please set your vcr's
or your TiVos
or stay up late for tv funhouse.
it's on at one thirty am on sundays.
and it really makes me giggle.
i don't think it is chemically possible for congress to side too heavily with writers and inventors...
The Supreme Court agreed Tuesday to intervene in a fight over copyrights, deciding whether Congress has sided too heavily with writers and other inventors.
The outcome will determine when hundreds of thousands of books, songs and movies will be freely available on the Internet or in digital libraries.
office tempers are rising due to a
bowling vs. laser tag debate
for next tuesday's company activity.
i say laser tag(!) but danny yoshimoto disagrees.
any opinion?
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so we didn't win the lottery.
we've consoled ourselves,
we've returned to the mad dog.
we're getting over it.
but in what i consider an abuse of privilege
(that privilege being that we are the daughters of a woman who had been a nun for 20 years of her life)
my sister asked my mom to pray for her to win the lottery.
something about that seems to smack of icky.
am i overreacting?
from salon...
"Their kisses have always been instigated by Piggy before,
but this time Kermit comes to his senses, and it will be
a very romantic kiss."
-- The Jim Henson Company president, Juliet Blake,
on a meaningful moment of interspecies love between
Kermit the Frog and Miss Piggy in a Muppet Christmas
special that will air on NBC this holiday season, in
the Hollywood Reporter
sorry, mat isn't home right now.
please leave your name, number and a brief message at the tone.
hi, my name is helenjane.
my site is usually www.helenjane.com.
it's a very exciting morning, not only because i'm trying to psych myself out of a hangover,
but i'm guest blogging for sweet, sweet mat honan.
hopefully, my banter will be a tolerable substitute for mat's hard-hitting mix of politics and social activism.
i like to talk about boys and snack foods.
let the blogging commence.
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2.18.2002
It's almost midnight. I should have been asleep half an hour ago. But before I leave you all...
I will be spending a week in Toronto next month, celebrating St. Patrick's Day and, should everything go to plan, fulfilling every wrestling fan's dream by going to WrestleMania. But is there anything else I should do while I'm there, besides the obvious touristy stuff? Has anyone reading this been there before? Have you lived there? I want to make the most of my visit so any hints and tips would be much appreciated.
Slán.
News junkies behold: the Guardian website now has a world news guide. And it's a pretty good one too.
In other news, Oliver Willis has redesigned his site a bit. Looks good to me.
Irish stereotypes:
If we were any other ethnic minority, we would be up in arms, vociferous in our disgust at such discrimination and insult. But we're Irish. We know when a joke is a joke. We can take it. I can't say the same about the Irish-American/Catholic community (their reaction to Father Ted was a bit much, considering it's one of the greatest sit-coms ever written), but we can take it. But that doesn't mean we can understand it.
I mean, spud-muncher? Well, yes, personally I eat a lot of potato, but I'm sure I don't eat as much as you yanks, with your 'french fries' and your potato 'chips'. And besides, potatoes were brought here by the British. As was cabbage, but that's going off on a tangent.
Paddy? No, I'm not a Paddy, but I do have a friend named Paddy.
Bog-trotter? Well seeing as I've never lived outside of the Pale, I've never trotted a bog in my life.
We're all drunks? I haven't had a drink since Hallowe'en (yes, it was a pint of Guinness.... but it was almost four months ago!).
Oh, but here's the best one - Loyalist paramilitaries have a tendency to call anyone south of the border a 'Fenian'. Excuse me, but I don't remember signing any membership forms for a movement that hasn't existed since the Irish Free State!
As I said, we can take it, but that doesn't mean we can understand it.
Is there a point to all this? Not really. I'm just out of ideas.
Oh, and apologies for the Hiberno-centrism. (Is that even a word?)
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I've just spent a quarter of an hour reading through this, the proposed amendment to the Irish constitution that we're having a referendum on in a couple of weeks (you'll need the Acrobat Reader plug-in to view the file). It took me a while to find it, no hits on Google; it's as if the government doesn't want us to think for ourselves..... At least I'm certain which way I'm voting now. I've only missed one referendum since I've been eligible to vote (I had a good excuse - I was abroad). It's good to vote, kids.
I'm currently nodding my head in a rhythmic fashion to the free CD that came with this month's Terrorizer magazine. I'm not sure if it's widely available in North America, I know the e-store at the Relapse site stocks older issues. If you like your music heavy or extreme in any fashion, I highly recommend it.
It's almost 10:30pm now and I really feel like getting an early night. To be honest thought, it would feel rude of me to do such a thing. I mean, two measly posts and then hasta la vista baby? On the other hand, I do have some readings to get through before I hit the sack. God damn arts degree!!!
This is not a good day for me, but I'm gonna try to make an effort.
To introduce myself, I'm Mac, from Dublin, and I'm today's guest blog-sitter. I normally blog here. To tell a little bit - a smidgen, if you will - about me, I'm currently an undergrad (final year) sans part-time job so I'm living off my savings. Consequently, I can't remember the last time I had a social life. I listen to the rock music. I read books. I watch TV. I philosophise. I write about it, and other stuff. I'm not very good at describing myself.
So why is this not a good day for me? I can't describe it. I just feel like I've been awake for three days straight. I feel completely washed out. Maybe it had something to do with my staying up till 3am to watch the WWF pay per view last night. Or just the prospect of my long day - only three classes, but two-hour breaks between them, and I live across the city from campus. I skipped my 1pm again today (philosophy of religion) but with good reason. I had to retrieve some documentation in order to get a partial refund on the Canadian work visa program that I have now officially pulled out of. (Now that was a sentence.) I should get the cheque - whoa, almost typed 'check' there - in a couple of weeks. Nice. Income is always nice.
As for this evening? I only got home half an hour ago (met Andy, good friend and former colleague at HMV, on the bus; hadn't seen him since Christmas, it was good to catch up). Yes, I blog from home. If you knew what the computer facilities in UCD are like, you'd understand. Actually, it works out pretty well for me here, 'cause it's still before lunch in SF.
Hopefully later I'll find something intermeresting enough (and less rambling) to post here, but right now I'm off to get me some dinner.
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2.15.2002
Looks like Dubya is going to fight pappy's war all over again. And Cheney is on some serious drugs if he really thinks that our allies will help us. (oh, sorry for the nyt post -- just use l/p of cypherpunks)
When is America going to wake up and realize that this is just a political stunt by Bush and friends to prolong this as long as possible?
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self-promotion is crass, but I just found this weird webpage on my old site. Getting back on blogger (which I left about a year ago) reminded me that I still had some stuff left there. This is probably -- for better or worse -- the best of it. Call it what you will, but it makes me think twice about that old addage that "you never know where money has been."
Well, after a morning of rather bad computer karma (first the DSL dies, then I post the previous entry to this page 4 times, then my browser crashes) I decided to call it quits and head out for some Korean food.
Now, that's more like it. I'm nourished (mmmm...kimchi...mmmm...spicy tofu) and ready to roll. And hopefully my bad karma was transient. While I was knocking back some Korean food, though, there was some really awful Korean pop music on, and to me, it sounded just like the bad pop music that I used to hear in Spain when I lived there. You probably know it, if not specifically, at least generally: bad synths, lots of high-pitched electric guitar riffs, bad refrains. This got me wondering: what is it about pop that's not in English that makes it so much worse than regular old pop, US or Brit style (which is bad on its own by and large)? Any ideas? It just seems to lack something, and I can't put my finger on it.
While you think about that, let me blog on one last thing before I get back to the drudgery of work. I've been enamored with haikus lately. It all started when I saw the spamku page, full of "tasty" luncheon meat haikus. Here's a quick sample:
SPAM: Shit Pork All Mashed.
Is there anything more gross?
Vienna Sausage.
My fascination with Spam haikus then spilled over into more kitsch, namely the Brady Bunch Random Haiku Generator. I've spent more hours than I care to admit hitting thre "refresh" button on that page. I'd love to write haikus, but I'm just too lazy to go to all that trouble. Unless anyone has any good ideas about how to start....
Ok, back to my real work of dissertation writing. More soon.
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Hola. Bob here. I'm the guest blogger today. And I'm getting a late start at this blogging since my Verizon DSL was down (bless their corporate hearts). Did you know that Mac OS X is the same as Mac OS 9? That's what Verizon told me, so it must be true. s-m-r-t those folks are. s-m-r-t. In any case, my apologies for the tardiness.
About me: I'm the proprietor of bobblog.net, my little nook of exciting blog action, where I typically rant about leftist causes and how bad my cat's farts smell. Stop on by and say hi.
What a strange thing it is to guest blog. I mean, I'm sorta nervous. I want to do a good job. I want Mat to give me a gold star when he comes back. So I'll try hard to show you all a good time. More shortly, if this *!@#&!@ blogger cooperates....
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2.14.2002
Only You Could Make a ’66 Beetle Look Good
I was never good with blondes,
but here we are,
wheeling around town,
clanking the hanging tailpipe on curbs.
I like your Irish lilt,
and keep sneaking peeks at your hat.
It’s KGB style with big furry ears,
(like Snoopy’s Red Baron).
You have a style that can’t be bought.
It’s a style that relies on a determined impulse,
purchases and acquisitions that no one else wanted to make,
years of buying for a special event
(or just because you like pink and brown).
We rumble through alleys having missed our turn.
I listen as you tell stories about this address and that.
You know so many places,
have so many stories.
You scare me.
I have busted lace holes on my sneakers,
boring gray pants,
a drab green sweater,
and I wonder why you are hanging out.
It’s not a confidence issue,
but did you see the way people look at me?
They are surprised that you know me,
that you brought me to the bar.
They are surprised because I am not Gerard,
Or Clooney, or Kravitz.
I am just a simple guy,
floating on the wind,
enamored and smiling,
patting my unruly hair without grace.
This car,
the way it rattles,
the windows that won’t shut,
it suits you.
It needs you.
You make it look good.
I finally get up the guts to tell you:
you scare me.
But why on earth do you respond
by telling me that I scare you too?
That was the last thing on earth I expected to hear.
After hearing that,
my seventeenth cigarette tastes pretty good.
Maybe I can talk to blondes after all.
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Damn, it's not mine.
Ok, I feel much better now that I’ve had a coffee and escaped my boss’ morning check in meeting. I went out with two very lovely (and tall…and blonde…and stylie…) women last night, and was a little aggressive on my consumption of mint drinks.
In the midst of our escapades, we went to see Frank Olivier's 'Twisted Cabaret.’ I would never buy tickets for a Cabaret, but we had free passes, so we popped in to check it out. The show was a mix of juggling, gas passing, fire eating, and unicycle tricks. It was all pretty typical street performer stuff, but Olivier is a so loopy that I had to laugh. Everyone laughed. Even the stuffy cool kids that squirm and look busy when they pass gas laughed.
Two things stood out, the fire eating, and the finale. The fire eating took place on a set he called "Cafe Flambé." The Emcee acted as a waiter and delivered increasingly difficult "dishes" of fire for Olivier to eat. One part of the fire scene blew my mind because I counted how long he kept the fire in his mouth:
one-one-thousand
two-two-thousand
three-three-thousand
four-four-thousand
five-five-thousand
That's a long time when you get right down to it. He had his head tilted back with the fire leaping from his mouth like he was a fondue pot. I was totally amazed. Shocked. I have seen fire-eaters before, but I can’t remember anyone ever holding the flames in their mouth for that long. Imagine fire in your mouth and count to five slowly. See what I mean?
For the finale, Olivier rode a unicycle in circles while playing a Hendrix tune on the guitar. A band backed him up. In between licks, he juggled four balls. When the time came for him to play another lick, he caught the balls in one hand, played the lick, and resumed juggling. Then he turned it up a notch by playing the licks behind his head. It was quite a set.
After the applause, Olivier stood at the center of the stage and told a story of how performing the Twisted Cabaret was a childhood dream. It was a very humble and gentle speech, and reminded me why I love the theater. Good show.
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Judge Valentine.
New Jersey.
There I said it.
Olympic Gate
If this was a job interview, I would have stayed in bed
First off, Happy Valentine's Day. Mat asked me to write his blog for a day while he is away in Mexico. I was also asked to introduce myself, so here are the basics:
My real name is Ezra, and I am Mat's buddy from the Haight Ashbury district in San Francisco. I go by the Minister of Brewed Beverages on the electronet, which also happens to be the name of my site. I also contribute to Oliver Willis' TV Blog. I play music in the world's most hated band, HAMoTAM, and am known for my sappy love stories. Today, I will probably lay low on the love theme, as I am sure that nearly every site you visit will be busy hitting you with heart shaped pop up ads.
Blogger publishing is testy this morning, so bear with me as I struggle to post to this page. Oh, if you want to email me, you can do so by using this address.
This should be fun.
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2.13.2002
No Bad Days
The movement to lump Eco-Terrorists (Eco-Freedom Fighters?) in with UBL and company is completely ridiculous.
So I leave for Baja today, but I'm not leaving you cold. I've set up a guest blogger week, and all sorts of fine folks will be filling in in my abscence. The schedule looks something like this:
02/14 - Ezra
02/15 - Bob
02/18 - Mac
02/19 - Helen
02/20 - Loren
02/21 - Dave
Cheers,
Mat
2.12.2002
As I said before, Bob Costas: seriously unfunny jackass.
Three fish tacos and a cold beer or soda will cost you about $3.00
Hell yeah.
Oh yeah...
Happy New Year
"I'd say you were a carnival-barker, except that wouldn't be fair to carnival-barkers"
President Bush's demonizing of Iran is a shortsighted move that misses a rare opportunity to improve relations with a crucial regional player.
Salon premium story.
goopymart (who created my logo you see in the upper lefthand corner) has a new cartoon up.
Cool
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Just a year ago, Harper and I were talking about traveling back to Iran (where I spent my youth). For those of you who haven't been keeping up, Iran has been liberalizing faster than a politician courting the anti-WTO vote. But things are getting scary again, largely because we've now deemed them an "axis of evil." Why the hell have we done this? Why are we causing a backlash to the popular upwelling of Western values that took place throughout the 1990s? This year we were closer to having a relationship with Iran than we have been at any time since 1978. That's done. Finished. And I'll be amazed if we don't end up bombing them.
It's weird for me to read about Iran. I've read several books on the country, and I always try to read the news of Iran. And it's hard to reconcile fact with half-memory. It's disconcerting to see a monument in a New York Times article and to associate it not with the news, but my boyhood. I desperately want to go back there, but I wouldn't dare bring Harper unless it's completely safe. And it won't be completely safe until we normalize our relationship with them. I pray that happens before my memories fade much further than they already have.
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The story of the Marin family whose child died just gets weirder and weirder. To recap: one man, four women and 13 children (all with the same father). The call themselves "The Family," apparently with capital letters. Why do freakish murderous cultish organizations always call themselves the family?
Reduce. Reuse. Recycle.
Carol LLoyd has discovered one of Harper and my favorite activities: furnishing your home with cast-off items you've found on the curb. But naturally, we give as well as receive. We've sent all kinds of things to the curb--printers, skis, computers (minus the hard drives), and loads and loads of clothes, all neatly packaged of course. We call it Curb Karma, and take the view that we get back about what we give.
2.11.2002
Satan Stole My Teddybear rawks. Seriously good reviews of metal, punk, industrial "and other music guaranteed to upset your folks." The thing I like about it is that they don't just review the latest Kill Rock Stars release, they also have an archive of all sorts of classics.
I love the Wattlist, precisely because of messages like this one:
does anyone know where i can find lyrics for no no no to draft and war? or a complete recording? the one on ballot result sounds like the beginning is cut off. i'm playing an acoustic set at benefit for a socialist organization in l.a. in a couple weeks and it would be a perfect song to play! thanx for any help from anyone
helen jane survived a major explosion over the weekend. (via ezra)
I uploaded a page dedicated to my 2002 reading list. I'm going to try to keep track of all the books I read over the course of a year.
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Scott says (in reference to this):
What about Gibraltar?
I am not sure what your criteria is, but I think this one should be considered.
Strategically important, Gibraltar was ceded to Great Britain by Spain in the 1713 Treaty of Utrecht; the British garrison was formally declared a colony in 1830. In a 1967 referendum, Gibraltarians ignored Spanish pressure and voted overwhelmingly to remain a British dependency.
I actually considered Gibraltar. And the Faeroe Islands. But in the end I decided to only include countries that are not only self-governing, but also independent. My ball and all that.
We got ours.
There's a great interview with Bob Mould in the Sunday Times. (via mefi)
Here's where I'm going to be for the next week.
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I was searching for a reference to Diane Whipple (the victim of te dog attacks that have garnered so much press) whe I came across this massive Dog Bite Law site. Check it out.
Man, the Bay Area gets all the bizarro crime stories.
2.9.2002
Minuscule Western European Nations, Of Which You May Not Have Heard
I spent Friday night watching the opening ceremonies of the Olympic games because, you know, I party. Now, if you read my site regularly you know I'm a Southerner in exile. And like all Southerners, my attention in 1996 was wholly focused on the Summer games in Atlanta. It was with these games that I began watching opening ceremonies, which I had previously regarded as a four hour halftime show (and, to some extent, I still do, but now I at least watch them rather than flipping to MTV). And, like every other educated Southerner trying to put a good face forward, I was mortified when they rolled out the pickup trucks. Mortified. "This is the New South? This is the image we want to project to the rest of the nation and world? Pickup trucks?" I immediately began making preparations to move to California.
And in all the ways the opening ceremony in 96 failed, last night's was a smashing success. The only drawback, in my book, was that seriously unfunny jackass Bob Costas. But you can't really blame Salt Lake City for Costas, now can you? The opening ceremony was spectacular. The Oklahoma-style Fancy Dancers and those large animal puppets in particular stood out. I was quite impressed, and no, the good people of Salt Lake City didn't pay me off to say this. As far as you know.
But what really got me, what really grabbed me by the pooperscooper and said "pardon me, but there's something here on the tellie that you really ought to see, old chap," was the parade of lesser known European nations. Now, I'm no geography expert. I mean, hell, I was born in the USA, what do you expect? But still, I thought I knew all of the Western European nations. So you can just imagine my surprise when The Andorrans came strutting out.
I leapt from my seat and grabbed an Almanac from the shelf, and discovered that Andorra was just one of a few Minuscule Western European Nations, Of Which I Had Not Heard. And so, I decided that I had a public duty to educate the world as to the plight of these Minuscule Western European Nations, Of Which You May Not Have Heard. But how does one qualify such a survey? Does Luxembourg count? No, no it does not, in my opinion. Everyone's heard of Luxembourg. What about Vatican City? No, screw Vatican City; they have the pope, and isn't that enough? I thought about basing the survey on population or land size, but either of those would qualify Monaco, which everyone has heard of. And besides, they have movies and casinos and princes and they even stole one of our Stars of Stage and Screen. Screw Monaco. So in the end, I decided that since it's my ball, I get to make the rules. If you don't like it, go buy your own ball. I'm the king of carrot flowers on this playground, bub. And now, I'm proud to present Minuscule Western European Nations, Of Which You May Not Have Heard:
Principality of Andorra
Population: 64,716.
Area: 174 sq. miles
Where it be: Between France and Spain.
And a little about it: It's a principality, governed by two "princes," (who have nothing to do with that gawdawful band from the early 90s) namely the president of France and the Spanish bishop of Seo du Urgel. Independent since 1278, it's had a constitution since 1993. Now I loosely quote the 1999 New York Timmy's Almanac (which was my source for all this bullhonkey): "Since 1278 Andorra has owed feudal allegiance to two co-rulers, the bishop of Seo de Urgel and, now, the President of France. Until 1993, Andorra had no constitution, so the rights of the rulers remained vague. Andorra's traditional economic mainstay has been the transshipment of goods (i.e. smuggling) between France and Spain. Spain's 1986 entry into the EU led Andorra to seek a customs union with the EU. The 1990 treaty was Andorra's first in over 700 years. In the same year, the co-princes introduced Andorra's first penal code and sales tax. In March of 93, Andorra's 9,123 voters adopted a modern constitution that will reduce the power of the co-princes and establish a three-branch government."
Overall grade: B+ We dig Andorra's feudal remnants and recent history of lawlessness, particularly the smuggling. This nation is Aces! But they get knocked a little bit for the whole Bishop thing. Come on, Andorra. Church and state, keep 'em separate.
Principality of Liechtenstein
Population: 31,717
Area: 62 square miles
Where it be: Between the Austrians and the Swiss.
And a little about it: I know what you're thinking, "Liechtenstein!?! What a ripoff! I've heard of Liechtenstein!" Yeah, well, screw you. It